Four giants of the business world. But only one of those men could keep an air-shop afloat through sheer willpower (and some serious bicycle pedaling).
Waluigi's latest applicant was a titan among men. Beedle the peddler was famed for his strong business acumen, his industrious work schedule, and his very triangular nose. Waluigi could relate deeply on all fronts. Men like Beedle were a rarity in this line of work - a true go-getter, a bona fide maverick.
"I have an enormous amount of respect for your work, Mr. Beedle," Waluigi said. "After all, I am an aspiring entrepreneur much like yourself."
"OHHHH!" Beedle began to clap. "THANK YOU!"
Waluigi took off his cap and shook his head. "No, thank you, Mr. Beedle. Your mere presence in this household is an honor."
Wario snickered from the couch. "Bro, you sound like such a simp. Why don't you, like, start licking his shoes, bro?" Earlier, Wario was insisting that he had gone to some kind of specialized school to become the man he was. He also mentioned meeting a colleague who had a son named Hamma Jamma at said school. He then proceeded to give out three imaginary cards detailing his career.
Anyway...
Waluigi clenched his fist. "If you don't mind, I'm in the middle of a very important conversation with a highly esteemed guest!"
Wario snorted. "Yeah, whatever, bro."
Waluigi's eyes stole a glance at Wario's television. He could make out John Turturro on screen. He wasn't sure if he was playing a Cuban-American bowler, an ill-fated bookie, or a playwright turned screenwriter who would meet a woman from a photograph. Such memorable roles and such brilliant collaborations...
Beedle waved his arms around. "HEY!"
Waluigi snapped out of his daze. "Oh, excuse me, Mr. Beedle. I ask that you ignore my oaf of a brother and his... asinine remarks."
"Heh." Wario chuckled again. "Bro, you said asinine. Good one, bro."
Waluigi pursed his lips. "Case in point. But I digress..." He shuffled a stack of papers in front of him. "Normally, Mr. Beedle, we would have to vet you thoroughly and walk you through the traditional interview process. However, given your experience, I'm willing to make an exception."
Beedle nodded eagerly. "THANK YOU!"
"Now, I'm aware that you're a very desirable commodity and that you don't come cheap." Waluigi narrowed his eyes. "And I'm not here to mince words. From businessman to businessman, I'll offer a generous sum. You make this game with me, I'll give you 500 Rupees."
"OHHH!"
Waluigi stroked his chin. "I see, I see. You drive a hard bargain, Mr. Beedle. Very well, then. For someone of your caliber, 1000 Rupees. That's my final offer."
"OHHH!"
Waluigi jolted in his seat. "It appears the rumors about you were true, Mr. Beedle. But even so, I never surmised that we'd reach this point, but... 2000 Rupees. Take it or leave it."
Wario looked on with great confusion. "Bro, what in the world is happening? Bro, I... You know what? Never mind."
"OHHH!"
Waluigi slammed his hands on the table and rose to his feet. "My word! Even 2000 won't satisfy you? Your greed truly knows no bounds. Fine! 5000 Rupees, you madman!"
"THANK YOU!"
Waluigi plopped back into his chair and wiped the sweat from his forehead. He couldn't help but smile. "I must confess, Mr. Beedle, that was quite exhilarating. I don't often get the chance to do battle with someone I consider to be my intellectual equal. Our meeting today was nothing short of historical."
"Pffft." Wario shrugged and reached for the remote. "I don't know about that, bro."